Plus, the orange tint makes me look like Jack Nicholson high on valium at the 2003 Golden Globes. So that's awesome.
Buy From $97, lensabl.com
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I found a this week that asked, “I wonder how many pixels I have seen in my lifetime?” The question sent me into an existential spiral. I spend most of my day staring at a screen—the 27-inch Apple Thunderbolt Display screen, to be specific. It’s 2,560 by 1,440 pixels. That makes it 3,686,400 pixels total. Sure, I don’t spend all 24 hours of my day watching 3.7 million pixels at once. But, god damn, my pixel count must be pretty high. What is that, billions? Trillions? Zillions? My poor eyes!
To be honest, I have no idea what these pixels are doing to my peepers. But for a while, every day when I got home from work, it hurt to look at things. I bought a few pairs of blue light blockers on Amazon. You know, those glasses that are supposed to filter out the bad stuff. Most of them looked silly, and some even made my eyes feel worse. But Lensabl, man, it cracked the code with the Night by Lensabl frames. I wear these frames every day at the office. And at night, they help me get to sleep, pixels be damned.
So let’s talk about how the Night by Lensabl frames work. From the name, you can tell right away that these aren’t exactly computer screen glasses—though, for me, they work just as well. They’re intended to be worn before you go to sleep. The lenses “block the HEV rays emitted from digital screens that lower melatonin secretion.” You're supposed to wear these specs before bed, so when you’re getting ready to tuck in for the night, your brain is actually, well, tucking in—not getting all amped up on the HEV stuff that comes out of that sweet, sweet blue light. And I wear them while I stare at screens during the day, too. I figure if they’re taking out the bad stuff before bed, why not use them to stay balanced throughout the day, too? It almost feels like I’m not staring at any screens at all. They work for me.
Remember all those photos of your dad in the '90s wearing shades that were inconspicuously tinted orange? Or maybe at a soccer game, you’d see some old dude with a GAP snapback hat, a Bugs Bunny sweatshirt, and those glasses that hung on a string around your neck. What happened to those? It’s time we reclaim that look. I love wearing these frames around the office—they’re called “Venice Night,” FYI—because they’re not just your unassuming CVS blue blocker frames. They stick out. But they’re also not too showy. Just the right amount, so you can still nod off in a staff meeting without anyone noticing.
Lensabl frames aren’t cheap. Even for those of us with 20/20 vision, they start at around a hundred bucks. Sure, that’s a lot, considering that you can get some dinky blue blockers on Amazon for like $5. But do you want to take care of your eyes or not? Not only do these shades protect from the HEV annihilation, but Lensabl also packs in blue-light protection, UV protection, anti-reflective coating, and anti-scratch coating. They have this satisfying little click when you open them up. They’re weighty, and they last. Take it from me, I’ve dropped them a lot. And I work at a standing desk.
Hook yourself up with these Jack Nicholson-in-Anger Management shades. They may not get you front seats at the Golden Globes, but they sure as hell filter out that bad light.